I learned something new about the Co-op’s Funeral services today. They run a bit of desk-top publishing on the side. And right now they are running an offer. Die now, and get a free set of service booklets printed.
Which becomes rather more complicated if you’re a Piskie, and your service booklet needs to have more than a photo and the names of hymns (cross-referenced with the dusty Hymns Ancient and Presbyterian at the crematorium). For the co-op can only offer 4 sides of A5 for the text.
So, the funeral I will do next week will have the special offer co-op booklets on the outside, and the KB special on the inside. It’s all free this time, so we run with it.
But I saw the price list over the man’s shoulder.
Normally, the Co-op charge mouners anywhere from £50 – £150 for funeral booklets (depending on the number).
Every priest I know offers exactly the same service for free.
Oh, but the Co-op’s are professionally printed, I hear you say.
Yes. But that doesn’t mean they know how to print a booklet with evenly spaced margins. The samples I saw would have gone in my recycling pile.
So, dear mourners, save your money. Talk to your priest. And do not let the co-op talk you into things you don’t want and would be better done by someone else anyway.
On the other hand, I would recommend the service offered by this very clever feline in Rhode Island. She curls up with dying patients in the nursing home to let the nurses know it’s time to call the family…