There’s an interesting article by Martin Smith on holiness and leadership over at Episcopal Cafe. It seems to me this should be required reading for all those involved in the selection of bishops in our church.
holiness
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Kimberly Bohan is a priest in the Diocese of Lincoln, less surprised by angels than by being so far south. View all posts by wonderfulexchange
wonderful exchange 
Knowing when to allow offence and when to avoid it is a very edgy line, I think. I have know ‘powerful leaders’ who felt that as long as they managed to create the upset they were doing just dandy. It takes a bit more.
It takes a lot more.
But we do sometimes overrate niceness.
Thanks for pointing to that. I think I learnt somewhere along the way that a lot of what leadership is seems to be about how I am myself. Not that I should be in any way insensitive to others’ feelings. But it’s more about my own rootedness and centredness – and that leadership breaks down fairly quickly if people perceive either dependency or fear in me. Like the days when I tried to work out how to stop the savage dogs which my parishioners in Belfast seemed to feel they needed from attacking me.